Apparently it's November?

When did THAT happen, eh? The past few months have really, well...I'm not sure exactly where they went. Here's the News & Events from My Life to catch us all up to date:

The Engineer and I are engaged! Again! But for reals this time, with a ring and a romantic proposal and everything. It's swell. The wedding will probably be next fall at some point. We've started planning in nibbles and bites. Our conversations usually go something like this:

Engingeer: "Oh, I know! At our wedding? When we say our vows? I'm going to pretend to slip up and accidentally say I love my bike when I'm supposed to say I love you!"

Me: "..."

Engineer: "Won't that be FUNNY?!"

Me: "How 'bout we save that one for the fake wedding?"

Or this scenario:

Me: "Hey, I have a great idea. 'Love is a Battlefield' for our first dance."

Engineer: "Yes! Awesome! We can follow that up with 'Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For'!"

Me: "So funny! We are so funny!"

Engineer: "..."

Me: "..."

Engineer: "Fake wedding?"

Me: "Fake wedding."

We've been having a lot more success planning our fake wedding than our real wedding. But our fake wedding actually sounds pretty entertaining, so....

In other news, the food writing is going well. I'm still working over at the Kitchn and have also started writing a few pieces for the Tribune, which syndicates several national papers. (Including, apparently, the Fairbanks Newsminer? They love me in Alaska!)

I've reached a good place, I think. I've been really worried about money, and between the writing and picking up some hours at a local bookstore, I'm finally almost making a sustainable income. It's enough to pay the bills and keep us afloat until the Engineer graduates. I guess that sounds kinda depressing and a bit anxiety-making, but it's actually ok. I feel like I can take a break from desperately looking for places to sell my writing and ways to make money that are still in keeping with where I want to go. I can just relax, cook, read, write, and be merry for a little while.

Well, I'm still working on the relaxing bit. I'm a recovering stress-aholic, so relaxing takes some practice.

Freelancing is both easier and harder than I expected it to be. It's easy in that it's not difficult to stay focused and do it. It's hard in that it's very difficult to walk away. Including the hours I work at the bookstore, time spent in the kitchen recipe testing, and time spent in front of the computer, I'm averaging about 50 hours of work or more a week.

The upside is that this is all work that I (mostly) like doing. I still moan and groan when the alarm goes off in the morning, but once I sit down at the computer, I'm pretty darn glad to be there. There are off days, for sure, but mostly I really enjoy what I do.

The off days are hard, actually. When I worked at the Noodle Factory, it was ok to have an off day every now and again - you just shrug it off and get back to it the next day. As a freelancer, I feel like I can't have off days. Not that I have to be perfect, but...the deadline train keeps on moving whether I'm with it or not, ya know? The best I can do is settle for a sub-par post at the Kitchn or scale back a recipe that I had been planning. It's been a tough to figure out the best way to deal with this.

It's also tough to say 'no' to new projects. I tend to see what accepting the project would mean for my bank account and conveniently forget what it would mean for the demands on my time. Having this good balance of on-going projects right now makes it easier - I can make the decision to accept or say 'no' based on my energy level instead of my need for money.

The Engineer has started looking for jobs for after he graduates (in May). This is equal parts exciting and scary. He's been in school for a long time. I think both of us have fears about how things will be once he's working full time again. We also might be moving, which is also both exciting and scary. Sometimes I can't wait for a new adventure and go off in day dreams about a new neighborhood and a new life. Other times the idea of leaving the community of friends and family we have here in Boston makes me want to...well...not leave. Sigh.

Anyways. I also have knitting projects and marshmallows and a few books to share, but now I'm tired and need to watch a few episodes of Buffy, I think. I totally missed the Buffy phenomenon when it was actually a phenomenon, so I've been catching up by watching a minimum of three episodes a night.

How are YOU all doing?!

Dreaming of Chili Peppers

Last night I dreamed of chili peppers.

I've been having trouble getting my pepper plants to pollinate, and have been fretting over them. Watching the pale white flowers unfurl so enthusiastically only to shrivel up a few days later and fall off--stem and all--is rather heartbreaking. Besides, I want my peppers.

So far I've only got the one guy pictured above, an anaheim. So obviously I dote on him by taking far too many pictures and nearly knocking him off the stem trying to get a good angle. That's love, alright!

In my dream last night, I was checking up on this pepper when I suddenly looked down and saw fully ripe chili peppers nestled in the dirt. They were bright orange and yellow and red. They seemed to laugh at me, saying, "Silly woman! All you had to do was look for us!"

Anyone who's ever grown fruits or vegetables knows that these plants have a mysterious way of showing nothingnothingnothing. Nothin' but leaf. Then one morning you're casually watering your plants without even expecting anything and you notice one, no two, wait THREE! little fruitlings where there was nothing a minute ago, you swear.

So this is why I half-expected to come out to the garden this morning and find yellow and orange hot peppers winking at me from between the leaves.

Alas, nothing. Just this guy. So we go back to waiting and pretending to expect nothing.

Random Thoughts: Insulating Felt Panels? and Apartment 2.0

I saw these felt wall panels on Oh Joy! the other day. They're from British designer Selina Rose, and I think they're kinda gorgeous.

I doubt I could actually afford these particular hangings, but I wonder if I could do something similar. Windsor Button sells some pretty big swatches of felt. With a simple stencil and an x-acto knife, I bet I could craft something fun.

I wonder if these would help insulate windows during the winter? I'm SERIOUS! Yes, I know it's summertime. A gal's gotta think ahead is all I'm saying.

The Engineer and I are making a real effort to redecorate the apartment and make it feel more like a...well....like a home. Until now, we've been fairly happy with the odds n' ends that we've picked up at Goodwills and yard sales over the years. Happy in that everything functioned (with the exception of certain toasters who will not be named), was in fairly decent condition, and wasn't overly unstylish.

But with "Moving-In-Together: Take 2" we're thinking it's time to upgrade. The Engineer is calling this new phase "Apartment 2.0." Because he's a geek like that. So sweet.

Looking around the apartment, we realized that everything--with a very few exceptions--has been given to us by family or been acquired for less than $10. We're talking the couch, our lamps, the fairy lights over the door frame, the poster in the entryway, everything.

That's kind of sobering. And it makes me feel a bit sad. Don't get me wrong--we've been incredibly grateful for the generosity of our families over the years. But it's a strange thing to look around and realize that nothing is really ours. I would like to live in a house that feels like ours.

On top of this, I had the startling realization the other day that I no longer qualify as a "recent college graduate." While I'm not the type to fret about growing older, this does still strike a certain resonance in me. It's a bit like shedding a too-small pair of pants. Or cleaning your glasses after being caught in rainstorm.

It's disconcerting, though. I mean, if I'm no longer defining myself as "A," then what becomes "B"? I guess you could call this a feeling of nesting. Or settling down. Or growing up.

So. There you have it.

Coffee Crunch Cake and To-Do Lists...

This was the last picture to make it into my final portfolio for school. I made the cake in class on Thursday night and then the Engineer forced me to hit SEND on Friday morning to get all the pictures off to Snapfish for printing.

It's called a coffee crunch cake--angel food cake layered with whipped cream and these coffee crunches on the outside. The crunchies were fun to make--essentially, you boil sugar until the hardcrack stage and throw in some baking powder. The sugar foams up and when it hardens, you've got this odd, honey-combed candy. A DIY crunchie bar, kinda like this one! Good stuff.

So the end-of-year countdown is on! Two and a half weeks until I'm officially done and gradumikated from culinary school!

Here's a look at my to-do list for the next few weeks:

• Finish futzing with portfolio pictures HA! One down!
  
• Put pictures in photo album and be dun wit it
• Keep experimenting with dessert gnocci (my original recipe for one of our finals. More on this later!)
• Make flashcards for American cuisine
• Make flashcards for Asian cuisine
• Memorize things
• Bid my roommate farewell on Saturday. Sniff sniff. (Don't be too sad--she's moving back to California--where it's sunny? all the time? huh?--and also just happens to be going to Hawaii for vacation next week.)
• Say "Hello! I love you! Hi!" to the Engineer who is MOVING IN on Saturday (wooHOO!)
• Iron my red polka-dot dress
• Wear said dress to my friend's wedding next week (Thumbs up, Kate and Adam!)

Additionally, I need to purchase the following:

• A photo album
• Photo corners
• Teacup and saucer (for original recipe)
• Butane cartridges for creme brulee torch (for original recipe...aren't you getting curious!)
• Coffee grinder (cuz my roomie's taking hers with her and I am bereft)
• Candy thermometer
• Gelatin
• Plants for container garden before summer is suddenly over
  

Totally do-able, right? I'm not going to go insane in the next two weeks, right? Heh? Who wants to taste test some dessert gnocchi?!

Peek-a-Boo!

Hello? Hello? This thing on?

Oh! Hi! Hello! So glad to see you again! I was gone for ever and ever and I've missed you!

I've been on so many adventures the past few months and I can hardly wait to tell you. There were so many moments that I've wanted to share with you, but the time? It just kept disappearing. Poof!

So here I am again. Hello! Oh, I'm so excited. I've been kinda nervous to come back. I mean, what if I post again and then end up getting all caught up with adventures again and time disappears again and...and... Plus, I hardly knew where to begin.

But all that's silly, right? Right.

So I'll begin right here. Today. It's Sunday. It's been raining all week and also very cold and it's very grumpy-making, what with it being MAY and all. Helloooo? May? Sunshine? Summer dresses? Yes, please? I bought the cutest red and white polka-dotted summer dress at H&M the other day (Dominique, I thought of you) that I was hoping to wear to my birthday dinner the other week, but it was altogether too frigid outside. Sigh.

I have one month to go on culinary school. Hooray! It's been a trip, for sure. I started putting together my portfolio of pictures tonight and was really struck by how far I've come. I don't think I'd really stopped to look at the big picture for a while. It was really affirming of, well, the past year of my life. Always nice.

I finished my internship at Cook's Illustrated about a month ago. More stories on this later, but quickly now: It was a good internship, I'm glad I did it, I learned a lot, but it also drained more energy out of me than I can possibly say. It was really intense and required a lot of...coffee. The last month I was there, I was juggling the internship, class at night, getting the hang of writing for the Kitchn, and also applying for a job at Cook's Illustrated that required a pretty intense working interview.

Nay, I did not end up getting the job. Sigh. But perhaps that was for the best, at least right now. I'm still processing it, honestly, so more on that later. On the plus side, I will have an article published in the December/January issue of Cook's Country--very exciting!

Let's see...what else? The biggest knitting accomplishment of recent times was the completion of Angelina's Scooter Scarf--check out her cute shot on Dustpan Alley. She's so kind to totally gloss over the fact that it took me TWO YEARS to finish that scarf. Two years, people. Such a shameful moment in my life as a knitter. Eeenyways, I'll have some more shots of this scarf in a later post. It turned out so nice--so much lovelier than I even imagined it would be. I love it when that happens.

I haven't been reading a whole lot, what with all the crazy adventuring and all. Nothing new to report there.

The Engineer and I are doing quite well. Fabulously, in fact. I'm totally grinning here as I write this (yup, alone...in front of my computer...at 11:00 at night...). It's been a pretty big year for the Engineer and I. You remember where we were last spring? Well, things are a bit better now. Very better, in fact. Things are happy. Grin.

And...I think that pretty much brings us up to date, yes? It's been a big few months. I've changed in subtle ways that I'm only now beginning to understand. The seismic plates of my self drifting and reconstructing themselves. If I had to boil it down, I'd say that I've grown up a lot. If I do say so myself.

But maybe not too much, right?

More soon, dearies....