And with the warm weather on the horizon, it is once again time to begin watching for that elusive and migratory beast: Campusious Hottius (a.k.a. Campus Hotties). Yes, the Engineer will soon be deluged with young hotties walking around campus pursuing such valid trades as sun bathing and too-short-skirt-wearing. This is what I'm up against:
I am not at all intimidated by these hotties (*cough,cough*...ahem), but I do find them infinitely fascinating. Since he spends most of his days on campus, the Engineer is constantly coming home with stories of Young Hottie sightings, stories that are usually accompanied by much shaking of the head and exclamations of, "NO! You're kidding!" on my part.
Ok, I'm not exactly intimidated by them, and to any young hottie wishing to snag the Engineer, I say "You best bring it!" But still...they do know how to make a gal feel, well, decidedly uncool. It's like these young'uns are constantly saying, "Yeah, I know ugg boots are UGGly and these shorts are too tight and this skirt shows my undies, but I'm so hip that I don't care. What are you, like, twenty-five? You're too old to understand." The aura of coolness oozes from their pores and you feel it in the specific passion of their disregard.
So this year I've decided to take a pro-active approach. It's time to make uncool cool again. It's time to Bring Back the Fashion. Yes, it's time for daisy dukes. And not just any daisy dukes, but knitted daisy dukes:
Daisy dukes, y'all! I missed this fashion train wreck back when it was actually "popular," but I feel the time is ripe for a come-back: Knittin' Style! We're talking soft blue denim yarn. We're talking belt loops made of i-cord. Fringe of elegantly unraveled bits of yarn. Oh, how to knit those interior pockets hanging so deliciously below the hem-line? My fingers do tingleth with joy...I think I will base my pattern on the Sweetheart Shorts from KnitPicks (click HERE), though I'll have to modify it a bit to work in the pockets. Plus I think the waist line will need to be several inches shorter--we need to make sure those belly buttons get their time to shine.
And I know you're all sitting there wondering if I'll actually model my dukes in public once finished. Alls I can say is, all you Campusious Hottius out there? You best bring it!
Oh, I think you'll win this one in your knitted Daisy's! They won't even see you coming. You better post pictures. I'll be sitting here waiting.
ReplyDeleteOOOOH, I love a fashion duke-out.
You've got me laughin' over here.
Today I was telling the Engineer about this post and he kind of laughed nervously and said, "...oh...you're serious, then?...um...Will they be people be able to see through them?" He asked this not in a sexy way, but in a "am I going to have to hide you in the closet?" kind of way. It made me laugh. I assured him that I wasn't planning on wearing them out of the house, but that he might have to take the pictures of my dukes-clad booty to post on my blog. He slumped back in relief and said, "Ok. I can do THAT!" What a guy!
ReplyDeleteAlso, I'm thinking of not actually knitting pockets but rather stealing them from an old pair of pants and sewing them in. I think knitted pockets would end up being too bulky and 'real' pockets would add a nice touch of nostalgic class. But I also feel like it's cheating a little. Thoughts?
Not cheating...that's a good call on the bulk issue. That's why "real" pockets are made of lining fabric and not denim.
ReplyDeleteBut, c'mon, if you never wear them to the campus, how will the Ugg fluffs ever know how much you've kicked their bahookies? (Max either got that word from a movie or made it up. But around here, we all have "bahookies" of varying sizes.)
Bahookies! I love it!
ReplyDelete